On my birthday in November, Ashni turned 9 months old (we were both born on Tuesday the 5th), and I distinctly remember thinking she was the perfect age. Her cues were much easier to read, so meeting her needs became way less of a challenge. She was more fun and engaging than ever before, full of smiles and laughter. And she could keep herself entertained for longer stretches of time. She was also just the right amount of mobile, crawling quickly and walking only when leaning against furniture. Sure I’d have to run and find her if she was being too quiet (never a good sign, usually meant she was getting into something she shouldn’t be), but for the most part she was fairly easy to deal with. Evenings were way better too since she slept soundly enough for us to have guests over without waking her up. And we could enjoy our nights out more too knowing that Ashni wouldn’t be up crying the entire time we were gone. Of course there were some bad days, but all in all, life was pretty great. I was even delusional enough to think (briefly) that another kid wouldn’t be so bad. No, I’m not actually ready for that, but I could see how some people could get suckered into spacing siblings around 18-20 months apart (like my parents did, ha!).
With Ashni being easier to care for, I found myself loving and enjoying her more. And now as she incrementally gains independence, I am better able to appreciate some of the things that I had been taking for granted. Feeding her was one of those experiences that went from frustrating to somewhat rewarding. A month after she started solid foods, she refused being spoon-fed and would only eat things she could pick up herself. This wouldn’t be so bad if she actually got some sustenance out of it, but usually the food ended up everywhere besides her mouth. Nowadays, she still wastes more than I would like her to, but she seems to be eating better for the most part. Although she turns up her nose at bland things like premade baby food, she loves anything with strong flavor and gobbles down fruit, chicken, and cheese. She also loves anything savory so a great way to get her to eat greens is to wilt them in hot chicken broth. She slurps them down one leaf at a time! I’ve also incorporated greens into smoothies for her, but I usually end up being the one to drink them since she only takes a few little sips.
Her low food enthusiasm might have resulted from her love of nursing, but thankfully that is going better too. There was a not-so-pleasant period of time when she would try fiercely to do other things while being latched onto me and would end up biting down and pulling with her hard gums. I was really scared of what would happen when she got teeth, but miraculously she stopped doing that at 10 months when her first tooth budded. Although I still have to wrangle her from time to time, she is much calmer than before and nursing is now one of my favorite ways to unwind with her. It’s very therapeutic to hug her close as she nestles against me. When she’s upset and seeks me out for comfort, I can’t help but feel really special. I like being needed and it’s nice to be able to make something better so easily. Granted this calls for difficult times when I have to be apart from her, but we’re still working on finding a balance.
It’s also been incredibly rewarding to watch her grow. She consistently astounds me with how much she understands. I’ve been using baby sign language with her and she’s actually signing back (rudimentarily, maybe, but still getting her point across). During meal times she will wave at me if she wants a drink or point to food that she wants to eat. She also signs for milk quite frequently throughout the day, but that’s because she associates nursing with a multitude of things such as hunger/thirst, wanting to be held, or being tired and wanting to snuggle and sleep. The greatest part of the milk sign is that she now does that instead of screaming and pulling my shirt down in public. Granted she’ll eventually lose it if I don’t act on her sign, but it’s wonderful to have some warning and to be able to offer alternatives if needed. Also, what really blew my mind the other day was when Ashni cued in on a conversation that didn’t involve her. As Chris and I were changing her diaper, he made a comment about the running water. On hearing “water”, Ashni picked up her little hand and signed for “drink” (we use “drink” and “water” interchangeably). We were quite surprised! Then the other day, after she crawled into Chris’s lap, he said he’d read to her if she went and got a book. She saw him sign for “book” and crawled over to her box of toys. After digging through it, she pulled out her book and crawled back with it, eager for daddy to read it. Clearly she’s smarter than we give her credit for!
As for life itself over the last few months, we’ve been super busy! Back in October, I had my first experience taking care of Ashni by myself for a multiple day period. Although Chris had left us for a night here and there before, this time was more challenging. Chris was out of the country for job training in Montreal, and while he was gone, Ashni got sick for her very first time! Consoling a feverish and congested baby all by yourself in the middle of the night is no easy task, and it made me admire all the single parents out there. As I stayed up all night with her, I worried about health care costs since we hadn’t yet transitioned to Chris’s employers’ insurance. It was difficult to reach him and I was beyond stressed out. Thankfully, Ashni’s fever broke in the morning and her congestion passed soon after. Chris went ahead and got our new insurance set up, but Ashni ended up not needing the doctor and was just fine for the rest of the month!
As the weather cooled, we were able to enjoy lots of fall activities with her. From hiking to pumpkin carving to dressing her up as an adorable monkey for Halloween, we had a blast. Ashni’s first trick-or-treating experience entailed her happily grabbing candy out of our neighbors’ hands as we went door to door. We didn’t let her eat any of it, but it was hard to stop her from chewing on the wrappers! Then in November, we celebrated my birthday, spent a lot of time outdoors, and on Thanksgiving morning we ran our first race with Ashni in a stroller. The five mile Turkey Trot was a success and we hope to make it a family tradition. We ended up rushing back to our house right afterwards to start cooking since we were hosting the big family dinner, but it all went without a hitch!
With Ashni being easier to care for, I found myself loving and enjoying her more. And now as she incrementally gains independence, I am better able to appreciate some of the things that I had been taking for granted. Feeding her was one of those experiences that went from frustrating to somewhat rewarding. A month after she started solid foods, she refused being spoon-fed and would only eat things she could pick up herself. This wouldn’t be so bad if she actually got some sustenance out of it, but usually the food ended up everywhere besides her mouth. Nowadays, she still wastes more than I would like her to, but she seems to be eating better for the most part. Although she turns up her nose at bland things like premade baby food, she loves anything with strong flavor and gobbles down fruit, chicken, and cheese. She also loves anything savory so a great way to get her to eat greens is to wilt them in hot chicken broth. She slurps them down one leaf at a time! I’ve also incorporated greens into smoothies for her, but I usually end up being the one to drink them since she only takes a few little sips.
Her low food enthusiasm might have resulted from her love of nursing, but thankfully that is going better too. There was a not-so-pleasant period of time when she would try fiercely to do other things while being latched onto me and would end up biting down and pulling with her hard gums. I was really scared of what would happen when she got teeth, but miraculously she stopped doing that at 10 months when her first tooth budded. Although I still have to wrangle her from time to time, she is much calmer than before and nursing is now one of my favorite ways to unwind with her. It’s very therapeutic to hug her close as she nestles against me. When she’s upset and seeks me out for comfort, I can’t help but feel really special. I like being needed and it’s nice to be able to make something better so easily. Granted this calls for difficult times when I have to be apart from her, but we’re still working on finding a balance.
It’s also been incredibly rewarding to watch her grow. She consistently astounds me with how much she understands. I’ve been using baby sign language with her and she’s actually signing back (rudimentarily, maybe, but still getting her point across). During meal times she will wave at me if she wants a drink or point to food that she wants to eat. She also signs for milk quite frequently throughout the day, but that’s because she associates nursing with a multitude of things such as hunger/thirst, wanting to be held, or being tired and wanting to snuggle and sleep. The greatest part of the milk sign is that she now does that instead of screaming and pulling my shirt down in public. Granted she’ll eventually lose it if I don’t act on her sign, but it’s wonderful to have some warning and to be able to offer alternatives if needed. Also, what really blew my mind the other day was when Ashni cued in on a conversation that didn’t involve her. As Chris and I were changing her diaper, he made a comment about the running water. On hearing “water”, Ashni picked up her little hand and signed for “drink” (we use “drink” and “water” interchangeably). We were quite surprised! Then the other day, after she crawled into Chris’s lap, he said he’d read to her if she went and got a book. She saw him sign for “book” and crawled over to her box of toys. After digging through it, she pulled out her book and crawled back with it, eager for daddy to read it. Clearly she’s smarter than we give her credit for!
As for life itself over the last few months, we’ve been super busy! Back in October, I had my first experience taking care of Ashni by myself for a multiple day period. Although Chris had left us for a night here and there before, this time was more challenging. Chris was out of the country for job training in Montreal, and while he was gone, Ashni got sick for her very first time! Consoling a feverish and congested baby all by yourself in the middle of the night is no easy task, and it made me admire all the single parents out there. As I stayed up all night with her, I worried about health care costs since we hadn’t yet transitioned to Chris’s employers’ insurance. It was difficult to reach him and I was beyond stressed out. Thankfully, Ashni’s fever broke in the morning and her congestion passed soon after. Chris went ahead and got our new insurance set up, but Ashni ended up not needing the doctor and was just fine for the rest of the month!
As the weather cooled, we were able to enjoy lots of fall activities with her. From hiking to pumpkin carving to dressing her up as an adorable monkey for Halloween, we had a blast. Ashni’s first trick-or-treating experience entailed her happily grabbing candy out of our neighbors’ hands as we went door to door. We didn’t let her eat any of it, but it was hard to stop her from chewing on the wrappers! Then in November, we celebrated my birthday, spent a lot of time outdoors, and on Thanksgiving morning we ran our first race with Ashni in a stroller. The five mile Turkey Trot was a success and we hope to make it a family tradition. We ended up rushing back to our house right afterwards to start cooking since we were hosting the big family dinner, but it all went without a hitch!
Now that the new year is here, we are getting back into the swing of everyday life. But it won’t be long before more big things happen. Ashni has her one year birthday coming up in just a couple weeks and it looks like she’s closer to walking every day. She took her first unassisted step yesterday, but hasn’t let us catch her on video yet. She’s also transitioning to one nap a day instead of two, but that has caused her to be a wreck during the times she’s fighting sleep. I don’t know what she’s going to be doing in March when we go to Japan for Chad and Nagisa’s second wedding, but I’m sure we’ll have a good story when the time comes!
